As I write, we are en route to my husband’s family
“compound.” As usual I’m not necessarily
looking forward to the trip because I feel the need to be “less handicapped”
visiting my husband’s family and friends.
I should point out right now, that this need is coming solely from me, and not necessarily anything Geoff’s
family has said or done.
I recently read a blog post from a fellow disabled blogger
listing her privileges. One of her wishes is
that when she and a significant other go out together, others would not feel
sorry him. I never really knew how to
describe why I felt uncomfortable around Geoff’s family, but I think she hit
the nail on the head. I take every, “You
work so hard” or “Poor Geoff” moment as a direct insult and reference to my own
shortcomings as a wife.
Admittedly, this is a result of my own self-esteem issues.
Do others think this when they see Geoff and me together? Probably, but why do
I care? I should be comfortable enough
in my own skin. Clearly, I’m not. But,
hey a girl can dream can’t she….
When people who don't know us see us together I'm sure they think "that poor man." When anyone who knows us sees us together they shake their heads and say "poor Katie has to deal with Mike all the time."
ReplyDeleteConsider the context, I'm sure you take turns being the "pittied" and the (cringe) "brave one".
That being said I worry much more what people think when I'm out with kids.